{"id":13850,"date":"2015-04-15T03:46:19","date_gmt":"2015-04-15T03:46:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/the-roast-of-justin-bieber-beliebers-beware\/"},"modified":"2015-04-15T03:46:19","modified_gmt":"2015-04-15T03:46:19","slug":"the-roast-of-justin-bieber-beliebers-beware","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/the-roast-of-justin-bieber-beliebers-beware\/","title":{"rendered":"The roast of Justin Bieber: Beliebers beware"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

By Al Masino<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Contributing Writer<\/em><\/p>\n

artsent.asp@gmail.com<\/em><\/p>\n

April 14, 2015<\/p>\n

\"Credit:http:\/\/www.myk104.com<\/a><\/p>\n

Credit:http:\/\/www.myk104.com
The Comedy Central Roast of Justin Bieber aired on March 21.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cThis was supposed to be a birthday present,\u201d said a bruised Bieber at the end of his roast. He further reflected, \u201cWhen I tell people what I got for my 21st birthday, I get to tell them I got my dick kicked in.\u201d<\/p>\n

The Comedy Central Roast of Justin Bieber aired on March 21. For two hours Bieber sat before a live audience as a star-packed dais of celebrities, led by Roast master Kevin Hart, gave Bieber \u201cthe ass-whooping he deserves.\u201d The roasters included comedians like Pete Davidson, Natasha Leggero, Chris D\u2019Elia, Jeffrey Ross, Hannibal Burress, and Will Ferrell (as Ron Burgundy). They were joined by Snoop Dogg, Ludacris, Shaquille O\u2019Neal, and Martha Stewart.<\/p>\n

Many of the jokes aimed at Bieber attacked his lack of masculinity. \u201cMy cast-mate on Saturday Night Live, Kate McKinnon, does a perfect impression of Justin. Right down to the clit,\u201d said Pete Davison.<\/p>\n

Jeff Ross tuned to Bieber and said, \u201cWhat\u2019s your rap name, Feminem?\u201d Shaq said \u201cWhat kind of bitch eggs his neighbor\u2019s house?\u00a0 You caused $ 20,000 in damages. Imagine the damage you would have caused if you threw like a boy.\u201d<\/p>\n

Some of those jokes knocked Bieber for being on Ellen DeGeneres\u2019 show, \u201cEllen,\u201d so many times. Ludacris joked, \u201cYou\u2019ve been on \u2018Ellen\u2019 14 times. You act so much like a pussy on the show, Ellen tried to eat you.\u201d Natasha Leggero reiterated, \u201cJustin, you\u2019ve been on \u2018Ellen\u2019 more than a pussy juice moustache.\u201d<\/p>\n

In the same vein, there were many jokes about Bieber\u2019s sexuality. Pete Davidson said, \u201cJustin has a lot of tattoos. You have \u2018patience\u2019 tattooed on your neck, and \u2018this doesn\u2019t count\u2019 right above your asshole.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen Justin got arrested, he had a big smile in his mugshot. Not because he gangsta, because he knows what goes on in jail,\u201d said Snoop Dogg. \u201cJustin, you so motherfucking pretty, when the inmates saw your mugshot, they swiped right.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe best part about taking Justin from behind is that you can shave half his head and pretend he\u2019s Miley Cyrus,\u201d said Jeff Ross. The harshest jokes implied a relationship between Bieber and Usher, who helped put Bieber on the map.<\/p>\n

Kevin Hart said, \u201cThere\u2019s a wax figure of Justin at Madame Tussaud\u2019s in London. He\u2019s face down in a wax Usher\u2019s lap.\u201d Ross said, \u201cJustin\u2019s ass is like a movie ticket \u2018cause it was ripped apart by an \u2018usher\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeff Ross had a trifecta of jokes aimed at Justin\u2019s previous relationship with Selena Gomez.<\/p>\n

\u201cSelena Gomez wanted to be here, but she\u2019s dating men now,\u201d said Ross. \u201cIs it true you dumped her because she grew a moustache before you? That\u2019s right, Selena Gomez used to bang this guy, proving that once again that Mexicans will do the disgusting jobs Americans just won\u2019t do.\u201d<\/p>\n

Chris D\u2019Elia, referencing the fight Bieber had with actor Orlando Bloom, said, \u201cYou\u2019re about to get fucked harder than Orlando Bloom fucked Selena Gomez.\u201d<\/p>\n

Commonly in a roast, the roasters get hit with jokes alongside the guest of honor. The Roast master, Kevin Hart, received a flood of jokes about his height. Pete Davidson opened up his set with, \u201cIt\u2019s an honor to be at a roast hosted by Shaq\u2019s dick.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI recently got married and Kevin was at my wedding because I needed a miniature black man on my wedding cake,\u201d said Ludacris.<\/p>\n

\u201cKevin is everywhere. In fact, he\u2019s gonna be on the next season of \u2018Game of Thrones.\u2019 He\u2019s playing Peter Dinklage\u2019s shadow,\u201d said Natasha Leggero. \u201cKevin does all his own stunts. He climbs into his own chair. He climbs out of his own bathtub. He goes up on his wife.\u201d Even Bieber got to knock him, saying, \u201cKevin is so short he calls Lil Wayne \u2018Wayne\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n

Snoop Dogg also got a lot of jokes about his current look. Jeff Ross said Snoop looks like, \u201ca retired WNBA player.\u201d \u201cSnoop, you look like Shaq\u2019s skeleton,\u201d said Natasha Leggero.<\/p>\n

Hannibal Burress compared Snoop to a rejected Mortal Kombat boss, saying \u201cNow you have to fight Fake Crip.\u201d Other jokes included Jeff Ross\u2019 looks (\u201cJeff, How am I the one who played 19 seasons, and you\u2019re the one who looks like he took 20 years of elbows to the face?\u201d \u2013Shaq), Martha\u2019s jail time (All these rappers on stage and Martha Stewart has done the most jail time\u201d \u2013Natasha Leggero), and Natasha\u2019s sluttiness (\u201cI\u2019m not saying Natasha is a whore, but Shaq can fit both his feet in her pussy\u201d-Hannibal Burress).<\/p>\n

Some jokes were edited out of the broadcast. Any jokes involving the late actor Paul Walker were cut. The jokes ranged from Jeff Ross, who said \u201cMove, bitch, get out the way. That\u2019s what Paul Walker should have said to that tree,\u201d to Pete Davidson, who said, \u201cJust this past year, Justin got arrested for drag racing. Unfortunately, it wasn\u2019t with Paul Walker.\u201d<\/p>\n

Overall, the roast was decent with a lot of laughs. The jokes may have offended some people, but that is the norm for these roasts. But whether you love Justin or hate him, any person could enjoy sitting back and watching the \u201cKing Joffrey of Pop\u201d get destroyed for a night.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n


\nThe Albany Student Press<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Al Masino Contributing Writer artsent.asp@gmail.com April 14, 2015 Credit:http:\/\/www.myk104.comThe Comedy Central Roast of Justin Bieber aired on March 21. \u201cThis was supposed to be a birthday present,\u201d said a bruised Bieber at the end of his roast. He further reflected, \u201cWhen I tell people what I got for my 21st birthday, I get to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[983],"tags":[4108,4109,4107,1263,4106],"class_list":["post-13850","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-albany-student-press","tag-beliebers","tag-beware","tag-bieber","tag-justin","tag-roast"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13850"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13850"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13850\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13850"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13850"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.techiteens.com\/review\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13850"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}